Comparing Apples to Really Expensive Apples

Gone Tropos?

(From the Archive – 1/15/06)

There was an interesting post in the new FSX forum on AVSIM the other day expressing hope that the airport environments in FSX will look as good as those seen in a promotional video for commercial flight simulator builder CAE’s Tropos visualization system.

A link to the promo video can be found here.

The full thread can be found here.

Like a number of people on the Flight Sim team, I’m very familiar with CAE products. I’ve flown a number of their simulators, we’ve even had the chance to meet some of their team members. As can easily be seen in their promo video, or firsthand, if you’re lucky, they do beautiful work.

The first time we saw the Tropos promo, a lot of us on the team essentially echoed the sentiment on the forums – I wish we could (or were going to, had time to, could guarantee our customers had the hardware to) do that!

The video shows some fantastic features – layered fog, smog, great runway / taxiway textures, wonderful falling and blowing snow, gorgeous ice effects on runways, and landing light effects that, because they use a real light map and not just an overlaid night texture like we do, are seemingly perfect. And you can’t overlook that wonderfully fluid performance, even with the compression artifacts in the video clip.

Let’s set aside the fact that CAE’s products sell from 20 to 50 units a year for somewhere around eleventeen trillion dollars, they have a lot more computing power and storage than we do and complete control over the hardware, while our products sell . . . more than that, need to run on some pretty ridiculously low-end hardware, and, after a year or two, can be had at Wal-Mart for about the same price as a case of State Fair Corn Dogs (the official Corn Dog Of NASCAR).

We’ll also ignore the fact that CAE builds a number of airports for familiarization purposes in excruciating detail, while we build . . . all of the airports in the world and everything in between in varying degrees of excruciation. Not to mention the fact that CAE gets to walk around the tarmacs of said airports, taking pictures and even measurements, etc, while we . . . buy books, snap photos on business trips, and stare at pictures from places like Airliners.net and Windows Live Local.

With those things comfortably cloaked in denial, there is one additional disclaimer:

I think CAE does spectacular work. They deserve every dime they make, their products are fantastic. I am a fan. The paragraphs that follow reflect neither the stuff nor the things of the Microsoft Corporation, especially its lawyers. The subsequent ramblings are intended simply as an intellectual exercise, and must not be used against me in a court of law.

Bearing all of that in mind, I decided to take a short break from testing the animation of the float retraction system on the FSX Goose, and watch the CAE promo video again, this time, as a tester. My inner skeptic (who lives just across the hall from my inner pretentious b**tard) just couldn’t automatically accept the premise that their stuff is “better”.

So, I took a look with a different assumption – how would I improve on it? Did they make any mistakes? Are we doing anything “better” than they are? I gave myself half an hour, watched the video a number of times, and this is what I came up with:

  • Their sun effect is static and it tends to look cold and small – our new “bloom” is much prettier, and I think even our FS9 sun was more credible.
  • The sky doesn’t change color during the accelerated sunrise scene – the lighting changes so it gets brighter, but it starts and ends a maybe-oversaturated blue. We couldn’t get away with that, at least not without bundling a copy of ActiveSky in every box.
  • Their clouds are flat, 2D, FS2000 era sprites. Ours . . . aren’t.

  • Aircraft shadows are extremely heavy, and dark, almost black all the time and don’t lose intensity in fog (in other words, they do this just as badly as we’ve done it, but our shadows at least aren’t as heavy to begin with).

  • Not all of the aircraft and ground vehicles cast shadows – it looks like they’re not rendering shadows when the viewer’s angle to the vehicle gets too close to zero.

  • Some static ground objects don’t cast shadows either, but some do.

  • Shadows remain fixed underneath those aircraft and ground objects that cast them – they don’t move or change size based on the position of the light source (the sun, in this case).

  • Shadows don’t interact with other lights properly either – the taxiway lights get darker and harder to see when they are in an aircraft shadow, and the headlight lobes of the ground tugs and baggage carts actually draw underneath the aircraft shadows.

  • Speaking of shadows, there’s no self-shadowing of the aircraft – you can watch the sun shine “through” the vertical stabilizer when the Emirates A380 taxis on the icy runway. We haven’t modeled self-shadowing in any released products either . . .

(Note: I hate to seem so obsessed with shadows, but we shipped FS2000 without aircraft shadows because not everybody who was in a position to make decisions agreed that it was a problem that needed to be fixed. We ended up having to release a patch, which has a dramatically higher cost (in time and resources) than people realize.)

  • The surrounding terrain is using some pretty low-resolution DEM.

  • Summer and Winter, but what about Spring and Fall? And Hard Winter?

  • Certain ground objects have no night textures at all.

  • Specular lighting, but no reflections on aircraft models. In FS9, we did reflections in chrome, for example, using an artificial environment map. <Edited to reflect Jason’s comments below.>

  • Gorgeous bump-mapping and specular, but again, no reflections, on the icy runway.

  • No touchdown smoke (we could probably afford to give them some of ours since we use too much.)

  • No articulated bogies on the A380 landing gear. They’re supposed to do that weird A380 “hang forward” thing.

  • There’s something wrong with the way they’re animating the compression of the landing gear as well – watch the bit where the Emirates A380 lands very closely: at the moment of touchdown, the airplane jumps and seems to be forcibly repositioned. It looks to me as if the simulation engine is taking into account a compressable landing gear, but that’s not reflected in the animation.

  • They could use some more variety in their trees. I don’t remember the numbers, but in our building, in the hallway just down from the restrooms, we have pictures on the wall of all of the currently available Autogen trees. There are a lot of them.

  • Aircraft control surfaces don’t move – no flaps, no spoilers, no fun. If ours didn’t, my work this week would have gone a lot faster.

  • Landing lights don’t cast a beam in the fog (watch the 747 land in the snow). It’s arguable whether no effect is worse than an ugly one . . .

  • Great snow trails, but where’s the spray from the wheels?

  • Taxiway lines are inconsistent – some areas are really smooth, in other areas, if you look closely, they’re really faceted – just a few straight lines with hard angles making up a curve. Overall, I’d say subjectively that our best is pretty close theirs, and our worst is a good bit better.

  • No sloping runways . . . I know, I know, but I couldn’t resist. I guess Austin still wins this round.

So, what’s the verdict? Will FSX look better than Tropos? In some ways yes, in some ways maybe, and in some ways no. After looking at the promo video with a more critical eye, I can say that, in toto, it’s definitely not a slam dunk in favor of CAE, even discarding all of the disclaimers I laid out at the beginning. When all is said and done, however, I haven’t proved anything here, other than the highest truism in software: there’s no such thing as "zero bugs."

Most importantly, of course, I’ve based my observations and opinions entirely on some pretty limited information, but I’m not the first flight simulation fan that’s ever done that. And that’s one area in this imaginary and slightly irrational competition between us and them where I’m happy to say we win, hands down: we have orders of magnitude more dedicated, enthusiastic, and passionate customers than they do.

Posted in Flight Sim Centric | Leave a comment

Software Testers Eat Steak!

(From the Archive – 1/14/06)

Now that I’ve explained exactly what a Software Test Engineer does, the question burning in most minds is certainly “How could I learn to be a Software Test Engineer? I want to earn big money, play the piano, and eat steak!”

That’s a great question, Bob! By the way, how’s that sister of yours?

If you have the basic qualifications (equal parts left-and-right-brained, obsessive attention to detail, unbridled arrogance, and the ability to remain permanently dissatisfied) then you can learn testing in one simple and largely ineffective lesson.

(If you’d prefer 293 good lessons, then be sure to pick up a copy of the superlative Lessons Learned in Software Testing, by my good friend’s brother James Bach, et al.)

My non-patented and completely unwarranted single lesson method is as follows:

Before you look at anything, assume that you can find ways to make it better.

(Yes, I know what they say about assumptions making an ass out of you and umption, but, in reality, I can’t even get out of bed in the morning without making at least 84 assumptions.)

It sounds simple, like me, but I’ve seen it proven under near-scientific circumstances, time and . . . well, just the one time.

I was working with a friend of mine whom I’ll call Anne, since that is her name. She was curious about testing, so I was giving her a look at the sort of work that I do. As an experiment, I told her about an art asset (one of our aircraft visual models) in the product I was working on at the time, and went on and on about how good it looked. Then, I showed it to her, and asked her what she thought of it. She immediately, and quite accurately, listed a dozen or so great features, and agreed that it looked really good.

Then I told her that there was a similar object that was a real mess, needed a lot of work, and I asked her to look that over, and promptly showed her the same model from a different viewpoint. She found 5 or 6 bugs (flaws, anyway) per minute for 5 minutes, non-stop.

I eventually, begrudgingly told her the truth. At least, I think I did. If not, and she’s reading this . . .sorry, Anne.

The point of this anecdote is not that Anne is or was especially susceptible to the power of suggestion – that isn’t the case at all. The point is that the difference between the two evaluations, or test passes to use the vernacular of the cognoscenti, was that I helped her change her starting assumption.

When she assumed something was going to look good, she found the high points. When she assumed that something needed improvement, she was immediately transformed into some kind of unstoppable bug-finding machine.

You can try it yourself, with anything – books, movies, the way people talk, their personal and political beliefs – and you’ll find that, to some degree, if you approach it correctly, you can test anything.

Movies are full of continuity problems (hair that parts and unparts, props that appear and disappear, airplane changes), books are rife with spelling errors and misplaced words, advertising abounds with misused "quotation" marks and catchy aphorisms that don’t mean what somebody thought they were supposed to (“At Shorepoint assisted living, each day is better than the next.”) The list goes on, as I so often do.

Once you decide that nothing could possibly be good enough, you’ll be testing constantly, finding flaws in everything you see, even when you close your eyes! And, most importantly, while the other chumps are lined up at Skeezix’ Soup Kitchen taking whatever they can get, you’ll be eating steak! Steak that’s just a little overdone, and not exactly the cut you were promised, ordered from a misspelled menu, served by a waitress with a crooked name tag on a plate that really doesn’t go with that tablecloth while a Muzak version of In My Life plays in the background in the wrong time signature . . . but steak, nonetheless.

The only tricky part is learning when to stop.

For more on this, you can ask my wife.

Posted in Testing | Leave a comment

On the Other Hand

(From the Archive – 1/13/06)

If you really want to see what the life of a software tester isn’t like, you could dive into the nearest cultural dumpster and flush 87 minutes of your life down this cinematic low-flow toilet . . . No, I haven’t seen it, but in the tradition of self-styled experts everywhere, I refuse to let that stand in the way of my proferred opinion.

It’s interesting to me that Allen Covert’s character is billed as the "World’s Oldest Video Game Tester", because he’s . . . 35.

Briefly and uncharacteristically setting aside the "video game / simulation" semantics, I was born in May of 1968, which makes me . . . more than 35.

Thankfully, my boss, Steve, is slightly more more than 35 than I am.

Adam Sandler, if you’re reading this, I’m willing to consider an out-of-court settlement.

Posted in Egocentric | Leave a comment

(Not Such) A Hard Day’s Night

(From the Archive – 1/13/06)

It occurred to me that I don’t spend a lot of time here talking about what I actually do for Microsoft on the Flight Simulator team. It has occurred to a number of people, especially my unbelievably dedicated and vaguely effluvial next door neighbor, self-appointed Blogstleutnant Jason, not to mention my patient-yet-eager audience of teeming several, that I don’t spend a lot of time here period.

Sorry about that, but I’m just thinking of the right words to say.

Anyway, I’ll try to offer some more detail in upcoming posts, especially now that the cat we affectionately call FSX is officially out of the bag we call  . . uhh . . . well, we don’t have a name for it, and thus another metaphor dies.

My official job title is Software Test Engineer (not “Professional Blog Avoider” as some might suspect.) Well, that’s really just one of my titles – you can see two more here, thanks to my generous and patient friend and Flight Sim MVP Nick Whittome. Others include former police officer, raconteur, bon vivant, Renaissance man, Uncle Hal, Rubberhead, the Piffle, and cutey-pants.

Some people, even some pretty esteemed colleagues in the still nascent software testing industry, will tell you that what I do as a Test Engineer, or tester, is to break software.

I don’t agree, not even a little. I say it was broken when they gave it to me, and it was my job to point it out. I suppose I just don’t like the image of testers as a finite number of monkeys with a finite number of hammers, inelegantly bashing away, when, in reality, my job requires too much research, creativity, and peculiar expertise to be accomplished through brute force. To put it another way, I think I am a very special monkey, with a damn fine hammer.

I can write a little code here and there:

10 PRINT “Heckfire!”

20 GOTO 10

30 REM OR DON’T

but I’m not a developer. In fact, I’m not qualified to even say the word “code” in the presence of people like Susan, Tim, Steve, the rest of our development team, or the guy who restocks the famous free drinks in our office kitchen.

I can mess around a bit in Photoshop (see my self-portrait below) a little bit and use phrases like “bump mapping”, “anisotropic filtering”, and “that is so gauche – ooh, is my beret crooked? ” without sounding like a complete imbecile, but I am not an artist. I sit in awe of the work of people like Jason, Adrian, non-bloggers Aaron, Kevin, Pete, John, etc. Many of them are even proficient in multiple media, which blows my mind – one of our walls at home is proudly adorned with a Waskey original, in oil. (Jason, on the other hand, does not have a framed bug report of mine on his wall. As far as I know.)

In addition to Developers and Artists, we have writers like Brian and Mike, Designers like Paul and Justin, Geo-Data specialists like Bill and Travis, Marketing people like Jerret (seen sitting next to Amy Grant in MY episode of “Three Wishes”), Program Managers like Mike, Mike, Kevin, and Eric, business planners like Scott . . . I can’t do what any of them can do, at least not nearly as well as they can do it.

But I can take their work, the work of some of the smartest, most talented and creative people I’ve ever known, much less had the pleasure to work with, and I can . . . help them make it better.

And sometimes, I don’t even need a hammer.

Posted in Testing | Leave a comment

Hoi van Microsoft naar FS Magazine!

(From the Archive – 12/13/05)

Just a short note to say "Hoi" and "Dank u" (I hope those are correct – if not, I’ll try to get it right next time) to our new friends at FS Magazine in the Netherlands – check out their site, especially if you read Dutch . . . They were kind enough to post a link to my blog a while ago, and, suddenly the post that they mentioned had more than 5 times as many hits as any of the others!

When I saw the hits coming in and looked at the site, I realized I needed a translator . . . In retrospect, I could have gotten a hold of my old friend and Microsoft Flight Simulator MVP Hans Van Whye, but, with all due respect to Hans, it seemed more like a job for my dear friend Mariska Wimmers.

Mariska, aka Mik, is a costumed superheroine who works at what I call the Hall of Justice in the Hague. She guards her identity closely, but there is an unconfirmed report that she looks something like this.

Anyway, as expected, she responded quickly, translated the article for me, and then sent a nice note on my behalf to the FS Magazine staff. Many thanks and veel liefs to her for her help, and to FS Magazine’s temporary webmaster Ferry Spaan for the support and the nice response he was able to send in Dutch and English. He even posted an update article mentioning the fact that I’d seen the site. Yes, Microsoft heeft FS Magazine gevonden – I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Speaking of hits, in looking at the sites that link to articles on my blog, I got one hit from Google’s Polish language site, because someone was looking for the phrase "you are a loathsome and sad little idiot". I hope they weren’t too disappointed when they ended up here.

And now, back to my Christmas shopping . . . .

Posted in Flight Sim Centric | Leave a comment

Blink, Or Don’t, And You’ll Miss Me

From the Archive – 12/11/05

I am an attention miser (perhaps a distant cousin of Heat and Snow) . . . .

I tend to pay it out in very small doses (as my friend Knat said in her brilliant article, How to be Distracted, "Hey look, a squirrel"), measure the value of things in my life by how much attention I’m willing to spend on them (my only real fear is of being bored), and, if there is attention changing hands anywhere in the neighborhood, I’d prefer to be at the center of it.

Since I was a teen-ager, from my early, star-making turn as Silas Ezekial Dobbins (you certainly remember the catchphrases of 1985, "I lak-a-you!" and "Heckfire!") in the Enumclaw High School production of Felicia Metcalfe’s thoroughly non-ground-breaking farce, Off The Track  and the vocal performance of Simon & Garfunkel’s Baby Driver (complete with my famous blistering ukulele solo, and, yes, I still wonder how your engines feel) that helped rocket three friends of mine and me straight to the upper middle of the Western Regional KEY Club talent show, I’ve rarely missed an opportunity to let people notice me. (I also rarely miss an opportunity to use long sentences and short paragraphs, as my friend Roy points out here.)

November 21st was no exception.

NBC, the network that once tried to boost summer viewership with the mortifying "If I haven’t seen it, it’s new to me!" campaign, airs a show hosted by singer Amy Grant called Three Wishes. It is a reality show of sorts, but unlike so many others, it is thoughtful, engaging, upbeat, and, as reluctant as I am to say it, even heartwarming. Like most of the best shows of the type, the basic concept is simple, and could have been written by a four year old: "Nice people do nice things for other nice people, and at the end, the pretty lady sings!"

Unfortunately, most television networks are run by three year olds. This, combined with the fact that A) I actually like the show a lot and 2) NBC airs it in the television dumpster known as 9:00 on Friday night, guarantees that the show doesn’t stand a chance. As a matter of fact, the most recent, and most important episode (because I’m in it, but I won’t mention that until the paragraph after next) is the last one of the season, and very possibly the last one ever. Thankfully, NBC (pronounced FOX) has ordered up a mid-season replacement, Most Outrageous TV Moments. Television about television, skipping straight to the outrageous parts, without all of that irritating plot, context and production value to slow you down.  This is a proactive move on NBC’s part to meet the FCC’s mandate that all television must be broadcast in ADHDTV by 2007.  

Speaking of ADHD, I’m digressing.

Back to November 21st. The producers of Three Wishes came to Microsoft because one of their segments centered around a smart and well-spoken young man called Kiyaan who wanted to be CEO of Microsoft for a day. Like any sensible visitor, after wallowing for a half hour in our secret money room, he headed straight for the Games group. He went to a couple of meetings, and even sat down with Bill Gates himself for a few minutes. At one point, word went out that they wanted some footage of Kiyaan bossing around a lab full of testers playing Xbox360 games. Even though most of us don’t work in labs (my office has windows, with a view of the parking lot, but, sadly, not of the gravel pit), and this, the day before the console’s launch, was actually the first time I’d ever personally played a game on the 360, it was only right that I should be involved. So, short story long, I sat and played PGR3 while the cameras rolled. When Kiyaan walked in, I was actually the only one to talk to him, so they ended up shooting some of our interaction specifically. My new ten year-old boss offered some thoughtful insights on how he would approach testing a racing game, while my mind meandered around thoughts like "I wish I would have shaved this morning", "I wonder if I’m holding the controller upside down", and "What’s my motivation?"

The episode aired last Friday night, December 9th, and, unfortunately, exactly all of my dialogue was cut. If you know just when and where to stare at the screen, you can still see me, sitting right behind Peter Moore as he gives Kiyaan his very own Xbox 360, a day early. I’m sure, however, that the excised footage will be restored in the DVD Director’s cut – I’ll be in my trailer, holding my breath.

If the episode happens to air again, it’s worth watching for more than just my performance as a blurry set piece – one of the other segments coincidentally finds a kid, as part of his wish to go to Space Camp (the place, not the movie that Lea Thompson used to warm up for Howard the Duck, thankfully), flying zero-G parabolas in a 727, courtesy of my friend Peter Diamandis and his Zero Gravity Corporation.

Otherwise, you might catch me as "big guy with beard" in a rerun of the now-defunct Discovery Wings Channel’s documentary Flight Sim – click here to see the commercial we got out of the deal. Or maybe even my unforgettable stint as "Jeff the bad guitar player" on Tacoma, Washington’s own Spud Goodman show in 1985. I really helped turn that show around – a scant12 years after my appearance, Spud landed both Weird Al Yankovic and Louie Anderson . . . You’re welcome, Spud.

It doesn’t really matter what you watch, so long as you’re paying attention to me.

I’d like that . . . .

Posted in Egocentric | 6 Comments

It Was Twenty (Five) Years Ago Today …

(From the Archive – 12/08/05)

 

 . . . that this man killed this one. That was, and is, sux.

This is not a happy anniversary for me. The Beatles, more than any other band before or since (despite some spirited competition), inspired me, entertained me, comforted me, and provided a soundtrack for so much of my life. They’re a little before my time – I was 2 when they broke up, and 12 when Lennon was killed – but my Mom and two older brothers played little else around the house. At least when my poor Dad – "Turn that crap down!" – wasn’t home.

Growing up, it felt like there was a Beatles song for everything, at least everything that happens in puberty. I can remember sitting in my bedroom in the 8th grade, my headphones up to 11, listening to You’re Gonna Lose that Girl, psychically singing along, sending angry mental messages to Steve Lytle hoping that he might walk away from the lovely Kelly Vaughan . . . and then switching tracks (and albums) to I’m a Loser, when he didn’t. I’ve Just Seen a Face helped me hold on to the chaste excitement of meeting Lisa Bonney – I was 15 and we never saw each other again, since she lived 45 minutes away by the car that neither of us could drive. Heather Graham (no relation) and I promised to remember the Things We Said Today. Jennifer Eaton always said she’d remember me When I’m 64, so long as I’d indicate precisely what I meant to say . . .

Day Tripper helped teach me to play the drums, and later, the bass guitar. Let it Be and Hey Jude, the piano.

Good Day Sunshine and Penny Lane invariably make me instantly happy. In My Life and Julia make me wistful, and, if I’m not careful, I’ll tear up a bit, since they both, in their way, connect me with my late mother, among others that are gone or remain.

John, Paul, George, and Ringo were lightning in a bottle – each of them undeniably and equally remarkable in their "own write", but, in combination, something happened that was far greater than the sum of its parts.

As a kid, even though they’d broken up, the Beatles were constants. Thankfully, the music still is, even though Chapman took John Lennon in 1980, and cancer took George Harrison 20 years and 51 weeks later, destroying my plans to meet them all just once and be able to say "thank you". My brother met Sir Paul (and the late Lady Linda) on an airplane once, and hopefully passed the message along well enough for both of us.

As much as I love the music, I disagree with many of the messages . . . I don’t think that All You Need is Love, for example – aside from the obvious bits about food, shelter, and Hot Tamales, I need Reason, and Productivity. While I like the politics in Revolution and Taxman, the lyrics of the simplistically beautiful Imagine are more Lenin than Lennon, and paint a picture that isn’t Utopian, as far as I’m concerned.

Irregardless, to use the vernacular of the peasantry, Lennon’s assassination was a tragic, terrible, and very personal loss for me, not to mention a few hundred million other people around the world. I cried my eyes out 25 years ago, and still choke up when I remember, and when I, if I dare say it, Imagine what might have been.

Chapman’s act represents the empty and short-lived triumph of ugly and irrational brute force over kindness and creativity. Chapman doesn’t deserve to be remembered, but history dictates that he will always be a footnote as the story of Lennon and the Beatles grows ever more remarkable with time. Lennon may or may not have been a hero, depending on what you ask of your heroes, but Chapman is undeniably a villain.

John Winston Ono Lennon didn’t deserve to die, any more than Mark David Chapman deserves to live. I’ll leave it to gentler souls to Imagine " . . . a brotherhood of man" . . . Today, I mourn a little, and Imagine . . . justice.

Posted in Thoughts | Leave a comment

Well, yeah, it was a little, but I don’t think it actually did that …

From the Archive – 11/29/05

What’s that smell? Oh, I know . . . it’s "old blog".

Sorry about that.

The last post seemed to be pretty well received, and a number of you have asked if we get other email messages like that. Unfortunately, almost all of our customers are sane, rational people with good ideas, and better grammar, so there’s not that many good ones to choose from. My personal goal for some as-yet-unannounced future version of our product is to really corner the loathsome and sad segment of the market . . .

I do, however, have two all-time favorites – one of them is lost, buried in an archive somewhere, but it consisted of a series of lengthy diatribes about how the sunsets in Flight Sim are not "anatomically correct". The best part was that the sender started each message with the disclaimer "I am legally blind".

Thankfully, I still have a copy of the other one and, even though I regret pulling out the big guns at this point, I’ve got to do something to distract the audience so that they forget how long its been since my last post. Here it is, with just one character edited for the family audience:

—–Original Message—–
From: XXXXX
Sent: Sun 2/25/2001 4:41 AM
To: FS Ideas
Cc:
Subject: PROBLEM !

I purchase your flight Simulator 200 game and i get an error that is
not suppored anywhere …. now that shows how cheap your support is
and we have to pay for it …. evreytime i fly around 3 minutes after
my takeoff or even just as i take off i get an Illigal Operation error
starting the following:

FS2000 caused an invalid page fault in
module TERRAIN.DLL at 0167:20c3942b

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY – THIS IS SUX AND SH*TS ME !!!

For the record, he was actually using Flight Simulator 2000, not Flight Simulator 200 (the like trees and mountains edition). Unlike MD, however, I can’t be too hard on Mr. X. Nobody wants their software to crash, and his raw frustration and peculiarly constructed profanity still resonate around here, 4 1/2 years later.

Here’s hoping that the next one isn’t sux, and doesn’t do that other thing to anyone.

Posted in Flight Sim Centric | Leave a comment

Tell_FS – Why I Shouldn’t Blog on Sunday Morning

From the Archive – 11/13/05

Every day, we get a number of suggestions sent to our tell_fs@microsoft.com email address. And, when I say “suggestions”, I mean letters from the widows of Nigerian finance ministers, offers for discounted Viagra, complaints about our copy protection, and . . . suggestions. Contrary to popular mythology, we read them all. The majority of the suggestions are great: well-reasoned and carefully thought out ideas from unusually dedicated and passionate customers, the kind of customers any smart business dreams of. Sometimes, though, we get ideas that are unrealistic, complaints that lack any real useful information, and suggestions that are actually offensive.

Yesterday, we got one that is all of that and more. Against my better judgment, I’ll preserve the sender’s anonymity, and refer to them only as “MD”. If you’re sitting comfortably, I’ll parse their entire message, bit by bit:

You should make it so that the scenery changes depending upon what year is entered. Like if its 1940 you’d have the buildings of NYC look all old n stuff.

We’ve actually dabbled in this area in past versions – we used to model the existence and absence of the Berlin wall based on date, for one example, and the eruption of Mt. Kilauea in Hawaii for another. The problem, of course, is that we already build everywhere, it gets almost infinitely more complicated when you ask us to build everywhen. Thankfully, if MD really wants to see NYC looking “all old n stuff”, all they need to do is get a hold of my friend Bill Lyons’ superlative Golden Wings add-on one of my all time favorites. Bill, if you’re reading this, you’d better hurry up and recreate every other moment in time. I’d like it by Christmas, if you please. 

Or if the years set to 1400 you’d just see like trees and mountains etc.

Because everybody knows there was nothing in the year 1400 but “like trees and mountains”. I have ancestors who fought prominently in the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, and, going back further, at the Battle of Hastings in 1066. They must have been pretty stupid, fighting actual wars when there was nothing at stake but like trees and mountains.

At the very least ya should make it easier for scenery designers to create time-reactive scenery.

Since I’m far from a scenery expert, I don’t really have a sense for how hard this is now, but I’m happy to agree with MD anyway and say yes, it would be great if we made it easier.

OTHER SUGGESTIONS:

-Make altitudes over 30,000.’ more realistic re: temp, air density, etc

Okay . . . I’m willing to bet that MD has no idea what, if anything, is wrong with the way we model these things at higher altitudes, but somebody told them it wasn’t realistic. But, for the record, if I had my way, we’d remove our 100,000 foot cap, and model the atmosphere right on out to where there isn’t any anymore, which brings me to . . .

-Make it so ya can go into outer space or even the moon

We’d love to, in fact, we already did once, but it didn’t sell all that well. Regardless, we’d love to do this again, but remember when I said that building everywhen on top of everywhere is almost infinitely more complicated? Well, multiply everywhere by everything, and that “almost” just disappears.

-More dynamic scenery like the car lights there used to be in FS2000

My friend and esteemed colleague Jason has written about these in particular, but, in general, I agree. The real world is a living environment, and, in an earlier post, I offered my formula for designing Flight Sim: (Reality – Last Version) = Goals for the Next One, or More Reality > Less.

-Cars ya can drive to the airport in

We get this one all the time, and it seems silly at first, but it intrigues me. In my perfect world (where I own all the airplanes and it rains Hot Tamales) multiple titles and platforms could exist in the same world. Why should we literally reinvent the wheel(s), when our neighbors upstairs have already built titles like Forza and Project Gotham?

-Cooler explosions like when the plane crashes wt fire and people running around screaming and woman going like, "Oh my god! MY BABY, MY BABYS ON FIRE!!!". OR HEY, how bout showing like Hiroshima getting nuked if you set the date to the exact moment in 1945 when it happened.

Seriously the time travel thing would be way cool!!

MD, we were doing okay up to this point, but you are a loathsome and sad little idiot. If by some chance you happen to read this, and you can prove who you are, I have a proposition: send me your address and I will personally, out of my own pocket, refund the full purchase price of Flight Simulator 2004, just so I don’t have to think of you as a customer anymore.

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What – Am I Reading?

From the Archive – 11/09/05

Taking a cue from Jason’s music listings, and a more direct theft from my friend and semi-retired colleague Bruce Williams’ excellent site, here’s a list of books that I’m currently picking at as time allows. Having been sick for the last two weeks (or, as my friend Jim Hogan put it in Junior High School, serving as the captain of the Federation Starship Sinasal Infectious) I’ve actually started to catch up on my reading.

So, without further adon’t, here they are, in no particular order:

James Bond – The Man and His World, by Henry Chancellor. So far, easily the best, most detailed, and most readable "inside story" behind Fleming’s books. If you’ve read them, and have already made your way through Andrew Lycett’s hefty bio, then this has already shown itself to be a must read. If your only exposure to James Bond has been the movies, then you have no idea what you’re missing. Grab a copy of Casino Royale (before they quite possibly ruin it as the next movie) and dive in.

Chasing Lewis and Clark Across America, by Ron Lowery. Ron’s photos are breathtaking, and his story fascinating. I’ve chatted with Ron in person briefly on just two occasions, but the book makes me feel like we’re old friends. If anyone wants to better understand why I fly, you can learn a lot from this book. If you want to see what I want the scenery to look like in Flight Sim 2026, buy it.

Lost In Space: The Fall of NASA and the Dream of a New Space Age, by Greg Klerkx. The book I wish I’d written about 7 years ago when I first met my friends Erik Lindbergh, Gregg Maryniak, and Peter Diamandis and started ardently supporting their X-Prize Foundation. The book helps set the stage and supports my belief that NASA should make way for people like Diamandis and Burt Rutan, people that I believe are the Galt and Rearden of the new Space Age.

Gentlemen of Adventure, by Ernest K. Gann. An aviation classic, by a true master. Rereading some of his every few years is revisiting an old friend.

Winners, Losers, and Microsoft, by Stan Liebowitz and Stephen Margolis. The most rational, even-handed, and, perhaps most importantly, calmest analysis of Microsoft and the antitrust troubles. If you hate this, then by all means don’t visit my friend Nicholas Provenzo’s site – you’ll hate that even more.

Success on the Step: Flying with Kenmore Air, by Marin Faure. I actually just finished this one, but it remains by the bedside for last minute reperusal. An excellent and fast read that tells the remarkable (and heretofore remarkably quiet) story of Bob Munro and his amazing seaplane airline, right here in our backyard.

Serenity – the Official Visual Companion, by Joss Whedon. I was a late convert to the world of Browncoats, but I got hooked, and hooked big. If you saw the series but somehow missed the movie, buy the DVD and cross your fingers for a sequel.

Frank Miller – The Interviews, by the Comics Journal Library. Fascinating insight into the mind of one of the men who turned comic books into literature by remembering that sometimes long-term franchises are long-term for a reason, and re-embracing your roots can be wildly successful.

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